Whoa...

Well, the details that I can give are vague, as of yet.  Not because I'm trying to be secretive, but because our information is still limited at this point.

Mark has been offered a job.  A what?  A JOB!  Thursday will be 14 months since he was laid off and he now has a job offer.  God is ALWAYS faithful.  God ALWAYS provides.  God ALWAYS has a plan in mind.  We have grown.  We have changed.  We have submitted.  We have been patient (at times).  God is starting to lift the veil on His plans for us a little bit at a time.

Apparently, those plans include a stop over in a little town called Alliance, Nebraska.  Nine hours from home for either of us.  What an opportunity to grow and blossom as a couple as we learn to cleave only to each other.  What an opportunity for us to be an encouragement to a teeny, tiny church.  What an opportunity for us to live conservatively and get out of debt.  What an opportunity this will be!

This year has tried our marriage (I wouldn't suggest moving away from your hubby's family, having your husband get laid off, having a surprise pregnancy, and being in the 7th year of marriage all at the same time!).  It has tried our patience as we asked over and over and over what we were supposed to be learning.  It has brought us closer than we've ever been and it has brought us to our knees over and over again as God richly blessed us and surprised us with His unfailing providence.

Yet, as I look ahead to this next phase of our lives, I am terrified.  For starters, Mark will be starting in Alliance very soon.  Me?  Well, I have this thing called a baby growing in me and due to my insurance, I'm stuck here...in Kansas.  Did I mention that Mark will be 9 hours away?  What if I have to have this baby on my own?  What if he doesn't make it home in time?  This was NOT in my plans!!!  However, I have laid it at HIS feet and know that He will once again take care of me, whatever that might mean.  I trust His wisdom that is higher and deeper and wider and greater than mine.  He has orchestrated this job for Mark and He will orchestrate the rest of the story to be a perfect symphony.

It would seem as though we need to sell our house ASAP, but what do we do then?  I'll tell you, in case you haven't caught the jist of things around here...we trust...we hope...we do what we've learned to do pretty well...we wait.  There are a few interesting possibilities that we're looking into.  We'll have to have somewhere for Mark to live there and somewhere for us to live here...all within our current budget.  Yes, God will provide the answer.

Do I want to leave my comfort zone?  Absolutely not!  Do I want to leave my dear friends that have held me up this past year?  NO! 

Is it worth every tear to see my husband proud, fulfilled, and holding his head high?  A MILLION TIMES YES!!!!!

We had a really great day yesterday with the sell of the vehicle that has been hanging over our head for a year...we've been trying to sell it since December.  I went to pick him up from Hutch (a small town near where we live) and as I drove across this huge bridge stretching across a huge train yard, a feeling of pride for my husband that I've never felt flowed through me.  Did I mention that most people have to go to 5,6 10, 15 hiring sessions before getting a job offer?  Did I mention that this was Mark's FIRST HIRING SESSION?!?  The pride I felt was of a husband that works hard with his hands.  A husband that works hard to make a living to support his growing family.  A husband that makes the tough choices (living away from us...even with Keaton on the way among them) to make a future.  A husband who is part of a great industry that is growing and changing.

I'm proud.  I'm thankful.  I'm excited.  I'm nervous.  I'm terrified.  I'm anxious.  I'm hesitant.  I'm hopeful.  I'm peaceful.  Weird mixture, yes, but I'm only human.  I've given it all over to God, but I still feel the emotions.  I just have to put them  in perspective and remember who created me...who created those feelings...who is in charge.  At that point, I can truly say that I am at peace with this situation.  God is ever faithful.