Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Day 1

No...not of creation...of our new life. It was a hard, long day with Daddy gone 11-1/2 hours. It will usually not be that many, but he left early to be sure that he arrived home on time and made a few stops on the way home. I felt rather blue all day long and Cassie was definitely out of sorts. She kept asking where Daddy was and searching around the house saying, "Daddy...where are you?!?" That obviously did not make things easier on me.

So, he's home now. Why am I at the computer? Well, let's just say that things were the happy reunion I had hoped for after a long day (for all 3 of us). He was mad at the mailman and tired from a long day (for which I don't blame him). Then, he was frustrated with Cassie and now he's on the phone with his dad. He's telling his dad far more about his day than he shared with me and I'm trying hard not to feel hurt. It's just been a hard day.

I know that there are adjustments to make and things to get used to. I know that this will all get better and we'll fall into a routine. For now, though, it just hurts my heart and I feel sad and lonely. I could definitely use some prayers, as I just have a very bleak outlook on things right now and just feel very alone.

Tomorrow, Austin and Aleigha are coming and I hope that they will help to easy the strain on Cassie and me both. I think it will help. At least I won't have time to think about it as much.

Sorry this is such a downer, but I'm feeling rather depressed. I know things will get better and I know that Mark doesn't mean to make me feel this way. It would really help if tomorrow was a bright, sunny day...


Bek said...

It's supposed to snow and be cold tomorrow, but I'm going to pray for some sunrays to come your way!

Bless your heart Devon. I know how you feel! John talked to his mom and dad more about his problems with work or lack thereof, and didn't even tell me. What's even sadder is that when I would talk to them, they would make mention of things they had discussed with John, that I had no clue about. It happens whenever John gets stressed out. I know how you feel! I wish they didn't do that! It makes me go to bed with a glum outlook, and it drags on and then I can't sleep. I hope you can fall asleep, a toddler and one in the belly is enough to make you need more sleep!

I'll send some prayers up for your loneliness, and your heart! I wish I could come visit tomorrow, but I have to work. I hope you can have a good day tomorrow, so I'll pray that Mark can sense that you need him. I love you Devon!

The Tajchman's said...

Devon, so sorry you had a hard day yesterday and it ended the way it did! I second Bek's comment that Jason can be thataway too. It must be a guy thing unfortunately. I do hope that today is looking brighter for you and that time passes quickly enough that Mark will be home before you know it!

tawnyamarie said...

Devon: Hope you're feeling better and your days get brighter. I definitely have the winter blahs myself.