Ok, ok...

Alright...I'll update. My bitterness is subsiding. I don't really have a whole lot to say today, though. I'm tired and in lots of pain. How's that for unusual. :) I'm just pretty tired of this whole pregnancy thing, though I can see the light at the end of the tunnel...it's a teeny, tiny pinlight. Yes, I'm in to the single digits...less than 9 weeks until my due date...less than 7 until I plan to deliver. :) I know, I know...he'll come when God's good and ready, but I can partake in a little wishful thinking right now to get me there... I just really and truly have not had a single break from this pregnancy between back pain/nausea/throwing up/contractions/etc. I've dealt with SOMETHING every single day since the end of October. It is just hard. I look at my house and think of how neglected everything is. I look at my bed and think of how many hours I've wasted in that thing. I look at my bathroom and remember how many times I threw up in there for 16+ weeks (and a few random times since, as my mom can attest to). It just is discouraging. However, like I said, I CAN see the light and know that before I know it, I'll be holding that baby boy and crying that he has to go get his little thingie sliced. Have I mentioned that I'm very sad about my baby having to be circumcised? I'm not so upset that I'm going to not do it and let him be ridiculed in the locker room or whatever, but I'm just dreading that little procedure. The fact that he is stinkin' huge and growing daily makes the discomforts even more joyous. Nobody ever said it was gonna be easy, though, neh? In fact, I'm pretty sure we were told that it would stink because of sin. So why do I continually gripe and whine about it? Because I know that you all are reading my blog. Maybe everyone should boycott it so I'll dry up. :) Please don't......... :( :( :( :)

So, the pain...it's my back as usual. Cassie wrenched it pretty badly Friday night. Just what I needed, huh? Whenever I get up I do 1 of 2 things. I am either limping (best case scenario) or dragging my left leg behind me because I cannot bear weight on that leg without the worst imaginable pain shooting from hip to toe. It's pretty much hurt since I was 6 weeks pregnant, but has been much worse lately and then worse yet thanks to Cassie thinking that I was a fun amusement attraction. HOWEVER, I have a POA...plan of action. My friend, Tracy, is bringing home the crutches from the chiro office that she works at. See, the leg dragging only lasts a little while...maybe 15-20 minutes of walking after getting up. So, I thought that if I can have them around to kind of take some of the pressure off whenever I get up, it would help me transition and ease that pain. It's especially bad after lying down, so it's really, really hard to get up with Cassie in the night. So, if I have them good 'ol crutches, maybe I'll just make it to June. :)

OK...I really am done with the whining. I'm so sorry. I just need to get my happy pants on and rejoice in the good things...the blessings...the miracles in my life.

SO, here is a list of things that I'm thankful for...are you ready?
*Jesus
*God's Patience
*Hope
*Mark
*My children
*Mark selling his work van enabling us to get a new roof next week
*My health in other aspects
*Cassie's allergic reaction (see below) on Saturday being minor
*Being able to witness the miracle of birth with baby Abigail Grace
*Watching Cassie's face light up when she met Abigail...she was SO excited and just loved the new baby...it makes me feel that she'll transition okay when Conrey comes. I know it won't be simple, but maybe easier.
*The fact that my parents have been married 38 years and Mark's have been married for 40. How many couples can make those types of claims?!?
*Good morning snuggles and good night kisses from my precious girl
*Church--yesterday was just uplifting to me (I know you can't tell by the above post, but I AM writing this list...) :)

There are so many other things, but that list has at least gotten me going in "thankful mode," so I'll end it there and leave you with this exciting story of the quickest ER visit ever known to man...

So, Saturday morning, Cassie was my little moo-cow. She grazed on all kinds of stuff including goldfish, peanuts, string cheese, fruit, fruit snacks, pretzels...the girl ate a LOT. Before nap time, she ate a Handi-Snack (although it was off-brand). You know, those things with the little tub of "cheese" and the breadsticks? Well, afterwards, she had a rash around her mouth, but I just assumed it was contact dermatitis or something irritating her skin...didn't really think much of it. As I was changing her diaper, she said, "Mouth funny..." I said, "Huh?" She repeated it. I said, "Your mouth is funny?" She said yes and started tugging at her tongue, at which point I realized said tongue was about twice it's normal thickness. Upon closer inspection, the inside of her mouth (buccal mucosa for all you scientific-types) was starting to swell and the rash now covered her mouth area and both cheeks. Well, being that it was nap time, I wasn't willing to just give her Benadryl and put her down for her nap. Being Saturday, I was faced with 2 options: walk-in clinic or ER. At the walk-in clinic, you get a number and wait your turn no matter the symptoms. I wasn't going to do that in case she started having trouble breathing. SO, we headed for Olathe Med Center's ER. By the time we were sitting in the waiting room, she was saying, "Atheths, Atheths, we all faw down!" That translates to "Ashes, Ashes, we all fall down," but her tongue was now impairing her speech. They got us back really quickly and had a nurse come in really quick. By this point, the swelling was starting to subside (thank goodness) and the rash was receding. By the time the doctor came in (all of 5 minutes later), everything in her mouth was only slightly swollen and she had really red cheeks with rash only around the mouth again. He advised on Benadryl, food allergies, etc. and gave her a popcicle for the remaining swelling. She was quite excited about that! :) He said that it is what is called a self-limiting reaction meaning that it flares up and then dies down on it's own as siliva and such purify the mouth/skin. He also said that it will get worse each time she has a reaction, so I'm to keep Benadryl handy. All we can assume based on timing is that it was from the processed "cheese" and keep her away from that. At some point in the future when we'll be home, I will try American Cheese and/or Velveeta to see if she has reactions to them. She never has, but it may have just developed. If she does okay with them that time, then we'll let her have those in her diet and be careful about other things. It's all just mysterious. One thing he said was that it for sure was not the peanuts, because peanut allergies are never self-limiting...they just react and keep reacting until intervention is introduced. That was a big relief to me, because she loves peanuts and PB. We'll just have to wait and see what happens in the future. If my kid comes to your house, though...no cheese and crackers that are pre-packaged or Handi-Snacks. Thanks. :)

SO, how's that for an update?!? Long enough? :) We'll see if I can walk when I get up from typing this long update. Y'all have a great week and I'll be back again soon...